The Great Corpus Crispie Kerfuffle reaches a fitting climax

WELL, on P Z Myers Pharyngula’s site, at any rate.

However, we expect the howls of outrage over what he finally did to the Body of Christ (in the form of the Eucharist) will continue ricocheting around the internet for many weeks to come.

You will remember that Myers – in the wake of reports that a Eucharist was being held hostage by Florida university student – asked his readers last month to score him a consecrated “cracker” which he intended desecrating.

Yesterday, Myers announced:

It is finished.

The Eucharist – which the professor described as “just a frackin’ cracker”, and others have dubbed the “Corpus Crispie” and the “Jesus Crust” – came to an ignominious end when Myers punctured it with a rusty nail, then tossed in the garbage.

Said Myers, in one of the finest pieces we’ve ever read on the web:

I know some of you have proposed intricate plans for how to do horrible things to these crackers, but I repeat…it’s just a cracker. I wasn’t going to make any major investment of time, money, or effort in treating these dabs of unpleasantness as they deserve, because all they deserve is casual disposal.

However, inspired by an old woodcut of Jews stabbing the host, I thought of a simple, quick thing to do: I pierced it with a rusty nail (I hope Jesus’s tetanus shots are up to date). And then I simply threw it in the trash, followed by the classic, decorative items of trash cans everywhere, old coffeegrounds and a banana peel. My apologies to those who hoped for more, but the worst I can do is show my unconcerned contempt.

By the way, I didn’t want to single out just the cracker, so I nailed it to a few ripped-out pages from the Qur’an and The God Delusion. They are just paper. Nothing must be held sacred. Question everything. God is not great, Jesus is not your lord, you are not disciples of any charismatic prophet. You are all human beings who must make your way through your life by thinking and learning, and you have the job of advancing humanity’s knowledge by winnowing out the errors of past generations and finding deeper understanding of reality. You will not find wisdom in rituals and sacraments and dogma, which build only self-satisfied ignorance, but you can find truth by looking at your world with fresh eyes and a questioning mind.

We at the Freethinker could not resist in joining in the fun when the story first broke, and ran a cracker desecration contest here. You still have time to enter.