Global financial crisis: It’s a recruitment opportunity for God

THERE are days that I almost feel pity for the Church of England. Today is one of them. So desperate are they over haemorrhaging numbers of adherents that the mere whiff of good news sends it into paroxysms of false optimism.

So what’s sent its spirits soaring this weekend? Why, nothing less than the global financial crisis, which has reportedly sent multitudes of Britons in search of help from Him Upstairs.

Well, not multitudes, exactly, but a few thousand who have gone – not to church – but to the C of E’s website to find possible answers in a special prayer posted there.

A new “Prayer for the Current Financial Situation”, according to this report, has been viewed nearly 8,000 times since it was published online in September, increasing traffic to the ‘prayers for today’ section of the website by 28 percent.

Wow, 8,000 hits in around three weeks and a 28 percent spike in traffic! There’s hope for the old girl yet – but their prayer site has some way to go before it reaches the level of traffic this little upstart of an atheist site gets these days.

Said John Preston, the Church of England’s national steward:

I’m delighted the content is resonating with people, and there is something the church has to offer people. I think that people aren’t necessarily going online to seek religion, but as they are browsing, their thoughts turn to it.

We know that many people do pray, but things are made so accessible by having it online. Instead of having to go somewhere, and find something, we just provide some words that people can go through wherever they are.

The number of people visiting a section offering debt advice – including a feature that helps visitors work out how the credit crunch will affect them – has also gone up by 71 percent in the past few weeks, the Church said.

Clutching at straws, or what?

For what its worth, here is Preston’s prayer:

Lord God, we live in disturbing days:
across the world,
prices rise,
debts increase,
banks collapse,
jobs are taken away,
and fragile security is under threat.
Loving God, meet us in our fear and hear our prayer:
be a tower of strength amidst the shifting sands,
and a light in the darkness;
help us receive your gift of peace,
and fix our hearts where true joys are to be found,
in Jesus Christ our Lord.  Amen.

Oh yuck!

And here’s one from the debt advice section:

Lord God, your will is to bring hope and a future to all your people.
Trusting in your steadfast love,
we ask your guidance as we work out a household budget.
Help us to learn to let no debt remain outstanding,
except the debt to love one another,
through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Honestly, if it weren’t so funny, it would be pathetic!