THEY are fighting for truth, justice and the Islamic way, and are heading for your living room -prepare to say salaam to the world’s first Muslim superheroes.
That’s how a report in The Times this week introduced an upcoming animated series on British TV – The 99, a Sharia-compliant version of the X-Men that has taken the Arab world by storm.
Its mission:
To instill old-fashioned Islamic values in Christian, Jewish and atheist children.
The series depicts the adventures of “preternaturally gifted Muslims”: The 99, each with a superpower that mirrors one of the 99 attributes of Allah.
The cast includes Jabbar, a Saudi Arabian Hulk-type figure with an improbable physique, and Darr the Afflicter, a paraplegic American who can manipulate nerve endings with his mind to trigger pain. There is also a character in a burqua — Batina the Hidden. (I’m visualising Mary Poppins in black shroud).
So far the series – a blend of fact, classic “kapow”-style action and Dan Brown-esque hokum — has proved a hit from Morocco to Indonesia and was branded recently one of the top 20 trends sweeping the world by Forbes magazine.
It’s the brainchild of Dr Naif al-Mutawa, a Kuwaiti who was a former clinical psychologist.
Initially, The 99 faced resistance in the Middle East, particularly in Saudi Arabia, where it was only passed by the country’s censors when it gained financing from an Islamic bank with a Sharia board. There will never be 99 characters because it is forbidden in Islam to depict all of Allah’s attributes.
Despite its Islamic basis, Dr al-Mutawa said that The 99 has universal appeal. He explained:
It is based on attributes such as generosity and mercy. These are not things that Islam has a monopoly over.
What fun it would be to see The 99 pitted against Bibleman!
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nyLcdhtsIIQ[/youtube]
The Freethinker was founded in 1881 by GW Foote, an outspoken critic of religion. After the publication of 
August 22nd, 2009 at 2:27 pm
'Ere, that flying bird's not wearing no burka… Cooor, she could provoke my uncontrollable sexual lust if she's not careful…
August 22nd, 2009 at 2:28 pm
'Ere, that flying bird's not wearing no burka… Cooor blimey, guvnor, she could provoke my uncontrollable sexual lust if she's not careful…
August 22nd, 2009 at 2:34 pm
I can see the list of characters now. Woman-Hating Man, Suppresed Woman and Infidel Boy. What fun!
August 22nd, 2009 at 3:08 pm
Do they come with a flake?
August 22nd, 2009 at 4:08 pm
Brilliant!!!
And chocolate sauce. And chopped nuts…
August 22nd, 2009 at 6:50 pm
So one of the characters can trigger pain by the power of his mind, can he? That must be the Sadistic Bastard attribute of Allah's personality that is displayed so often by his followers!
August 22nd, 2009 at 7:44 pm
I'd bet good money they don't have adamantium skeletons. Wolverine could kick their arses round the block!
August 22nd, 2009 at 8:30 pm
BTW As they are not allowed to portray all 99 attributes of Allah, shouldn't they be called The 69ers or something similar? Just a suggestion.
August 22nd, 2009 at 8:42 pm
I can feel a Muslim Musical coming on here, Barry! I've already got a song for the "Mary Poppins" character – "A Spoonful Of Sugar Helps The Flogging Go Okay". Should be a riot .(Sorry – wrong choice of word there!!).
August 22nd, 2009 at 9:09 pm
How about Outrageman, "the TeeTotalitarian" & "Kills Women With a Brick Dude"?
August 22nd, 2009 at 9:33 pm
Ha! My god can beat up your god.
August 22nd, 2009 at 10:34 pm
Unshaved man, Niqab girl, Bomberman, Super-Bomberman (in joke), Whipping boy, Homosexual-killer-man, Intolerance-man, Wifebeaterman, Cousinfuckerman, childraperman, Lefthand arsewipe man…
the possibilities are endless – well until 99 of them pass muster
August 23rd, 2009 at 4:52 am
I'm wondering what kind of injustices they find to fight against, with their old fashioned islamic values. Women in t-shirts? Gays kissing? Teddy bears named Mohammed?
August 23rd, 2009 at 6:43 am
It’s a bit pathetic, this copying of decadent Western stuff (like Barbie) and then making their own version of it. But well, there’s some coying in the their holy book, too. As for ‘Islamic values’: we know about stoning, caning, hanging, dismembering, decapitation – will there be characters dedicated to these virtues as well?
August 23rd, 2009 at 8:15 am
Is it too much to hope that little Muslims will find them as ridiculous as we do. There is after all nothing more uncool that desperate efforts to make religion look cool.
August 23rd, 2009 at 8:42 am
Yes it is, Stoneyground. The 99 is going down a bomb (as it were) in Islamic countries. See
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rfp-dLY-8ME” target=”_blank”>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rfp-dLY-8ME
Incidentally, I have just learned that the characters are being drawn by an INFIDEL – an artist from Northern Ireland! – because there is no tradition in Muslim countries of comic creation and no Muslim could be found to draw them. How ironic is that?
See
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pM7shGGYQ2c” target=”_blank”>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pM7shGGYQ2c
August 23rd, 2009 at 9:16 am
I thought the reason for this might be the Muslim prohibition on the depiction of living things (just in case one of the idiots should feel compelled to fall down and worship a picture of a daisy!). Apparently, you can't actually produce these images yourself then, but it's perfectly OK for your children to look at them. Strange logic.
BTW Have other readers clocked the comments on the Times site? Three guesses what the first Muslim comment is? "Islam is a religion of peace! (I'm not kidding.) The writer then goes on to blame the "intelligence and secret services" for all the terrorism, as it "has no relationship with Islam". You could weep really, couldn't you?
August 23rd, 2009 at 9:55 am
You'll Believe A Man Can Fly (Straight into A Tall Building).
August 23rd, 2009 at 2:08 pm
Will we see an episode when one of the 99 are trapped inside a cage made of bacon? as a cliffhanger perhaps…
oh and "the flag burner" should feature imho