NOTORIOUS evangelical nutjob, Danny Nalliah, has been mouthing off once again, claiming this week that “dark forces” were at work in Australia’s Federal Parliament.
Winner of the 2009 Ernie Award for the most sexist statement of the year – the Catch the Fire Ministry pastor claimed he had received “prophetic dreams” that Australian bushfires in 2008 were a “consequence” of Victoria’s decriminalisation of abortion – Nalliah was prompted to make his latest remarks after a group of schoolchildren discovered what is alleged to be “a black mass altar” at Mount Ainslie in Canberra.
The demented Danny Nalliah
The demented Sri Lankan-born Bible-basher said:
The type of altar discovered on Mount Ainslie pointed to a black mass and the work of dark forces wanting to cast spells on Australia and federal parliament. These days people don’t think the Devil is real but we have seen the bad effects of the spiritual being known as Satan and we believe there is a spiritual fight over the nation of Australia being fought in the heavens.
And what precisely are these “bad effects” brought about by Satan?
Nalliah said:
Me trying to explain it to you is like trying to teach a cricketer how to play soccer.
But he did point to:
The number of politicians who have serious marriage problems.
And then, of course there’s legislation supporting homosexuality, abortion and a push for a Bill of Rights.
The potty pastor has decided to see the Devil off with a “prayer offensive”. He and 100 Christians from across Australia will be at Mount Ainslie this weekend to give Satan his marching orders.
Our main reason for going to Mount Ainslie is to pull down the strongholds of the Devil [and] to repent and pray against any evil done in our land including the adverse effects of witchcraft, homosexuality and, of course, the devastation of abortion, so that God will save our land.
Old Nick must be trembling on his hairy old hooves.
Hat tip: Bill
The Freethinker was founded in 1881 by GW Foote, an outspoken critic of religion. After the publication of 
October 15th, 2009 at 8:55 am
This may seem very amusing to most, but sadly, as an ex-evangelical, I can assure you that many people really do believe all this bullshit!
October 15th, 2009 at 10:00 am
Good! then by Monday Australia should be all better. We'll see, huh?
BTW, "Bible-basher" is apparently something of a contranym.
October 15th, 2009 at 10:16 am
I'm pretty sure cricketers have a better understanding of the off-side rule than Nalliah does.
Back of the net!!!
October 15th, 2009 at 11:18 am
Has he never heard of Ian Botham? Brilliant cricketer and reasonable footballer.
October 15th, 2009 at 10:20 am
Send in a camera-crew and broadcast this live on the internet, so I can see this epic fight between Light and Darkness! I hope it'll be like Lord of the Rings, with all kinds of special effects.
October 15th, 2009 at 10:24 am
And not forgetting W G Grace. Greatest cricketer of all time, also played football for Wanderers.
October 15th, 2009 at 10:38 am
You have "outed" yourself a few times as an ex-evangelical. I think it is now time I come out of the closet. I was once a Christian. There, I have said it. From the age of 17, when I had myself secretly baptized, probably out of teenage rebellion against my atheist father, until my early 30s, when I came back to my senses, I occasionally went to church (German Protestant and Methodist).
An interesting question presents itself: During those 15 years or so, was I fully human, as judged by Cormac Murphy-O'Connor? Pity it is such a long time ago that I cannot remember.
October 15th, 2009 at 10:40 am
Dennis Compton, Middlesex and Arsenal also Brylcreem Boy. That works wonders on hairshirts I imagine.
October 15th, 2009 at 10:42 am
As long as all he does is mouth off and conduct prayer sessions, then he's not doing any harm.
In fact, he's providing entertainment for rationalists with a sense of humour.
Don't you just love it when religious fanatics bring ridicule upon themselves? I think they should be encouraged rather than dissuaded.
October 15th, 2009 at 11:33 am
First president of the English Bowling Association, too, Rosemarie! (Learnt that only recently courtesy of Bamber Boozler!)
October 15th, 2009 at 12:09 pm
"……100 Christians from across Australia will be at Mount Ainslie…. " Nice target, hopefully there will be a massive thunderstorm and this bunch of loons get struck by lightning.
October 15th, 2009 at 12:16 pm
Very true barriejohn, though his overarm delivery didn't go down too well on the green!
October 15th, 2009 at 2:32 pm
I will be there, as will the Australian Sex Party :
http://www.smh.com.au/national.....-co…
Any other Aussies reading this, come along, should be fun
October 15th, 2009 at 3:47 pm
Inter-Hades Memo
From: Satan, Father of Lies, Destroyer of Worlds, etc., etc.
To: All Dukes of Hell, Minions, Demons, Liberals, Gays, etc.
"Curses. Foiled again."
October 15th, 2009 at 4:32 pm
Oh, dear: big mistake there, remigius! W. G. Grace never accepted overarm bowling, and bowled "roundarm" to his dying day! (Don't you think that, much like the Hague Conventions, the rules of sport are just too silly for words?)
October 15th, 2009 at 4:34 pm
Where are they going to find 100 Christians in Australia?
October 15th, 2009 at 4:37 pm
That's more like it! ("We are a secular society increasingly being run by religious agendas". Join the club!!)
October 15th, 2009 at 4:56 pm
barriejohn, shouldn't that be the old joke: where are they going to find 100 virgins!
October 15th, 2009 at 4:58 pm
He did persist with roundarm…in cricket. However in bowling (as in Crown Green) which is what we are talking about here, he developed a high overarm lob technique, rather like a shot-putter. He would launch his wood skywards towards the end. It would hover over the jack, and then plummet, often driving the jack several inches into the turf!
He wasn't popular among the retired folk of Eastbourne.
October 15th, 2009 at 6:23 pm
From: All Dukes of Hell, Minions, Demons, Liberals, Gays, etc.
To: Satan, Father of Lies, Destroyer of Worlds, etc.
Patience Lord, by the end of the month we will have sugar-craving kiddies in our clutches once again.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new.....0/C…
October 16th, 2009 at 2:36 pm
From: Satan, D of W's, etc.
To: Minions, et al
Excellent work, you fellows! Nothing makes Me happier than Candied Apples of Evil and Satanic Candy Corn. Keep up the good work and there will be a little something extra in the next paycheck.
October 17th, 2009 at 10:14 pm
How's he coming with those demonic forces?
October 21st, 2009 at 3:16 pm
How will Suzy Salt and Percy Pepper feel about this?