A BLASPHEMY complaint against a sports magazine has been dismissed by the press ombudsman in South Africa.
Sports Illustrated raised the wrath of a reader when, in March, it published a golfing joke featuring Jesus and St Peter in the context of an article about technology in sport.
Jesus portrayed as a golfing coach in this cheesy - and somewhat suggestive - ornament obtainable from CatholicShopper.com. How can one possibly resist it?
When Jesus hooked his first tee-shot, an angel guided the ball back into play, the Dove of Peace caught the ball in its beak and dropped it on the green, from where the Holy Spirit blew the ball into the hole.
An exasperated St Peter then said to Jesus:
Do you wanna play golf or do you wanna fuck around?
Clearing St Peter (and the magazine) of blasphemy, deputy ombudsman Johan Retief said yesterday that SPÂ was expressing his feelings, not swearing or blaspheming, when he urged Jesus not to “fuck around” .
Retief revealed that the complainant, André Williams, insisted that the article went too far by telling a joke about Jesus, and that the word “fuck” was a swearword that amounted to blasphemy.
Williams also played the “you wouldn’t mess like this with the Muslims card” when he asked what would happen if the names of St Peter and Jesus were replaced with Mohammed and Allah.
But Retief ruled that the phrase ‘fuck around’ was used to express a feeling of irritation, and did not amount to swearing.
‘Fuck you’ would have been swearing. Although it can be said that the use of the phrase ‘fuck around’ constitutes bad taste, it does not, by definition, amount to a breach of the Press Code.
He also said the context of the joke in the story – that technology could turn sport into a joke in its pursuit of perfection – was of vital importance.
The fact that the joke had been published many times all over the world indicated a moral climate that tolerated it.
He said the question of what would happen if the names were replaced with Mohammed and Allah was hypothetical as each case had to be considered on its own merits.
The Freethinker was founded in 1881 by GW Foote, an outspoken critic of religion. After the publication of 
June 22nd, 2010 at 8:57 am
Well, fuck me!
June 22nd, 2010 at 9:10 am
Religious outrage over the slighting of “deeply held beliefs” once more. The article suggests André Williams was the sole complainant from a readership of 23 million worldwide (Wikipedia). He could have contacted Sports Illustrated directly or boycotted their magazine. Instead he chose to bother the Press Ombudsman who I suspect considered his complaint for about five seconds before its rejection. I hope there’s no mechanism for the religiot to appeal against the ruling.
June 22nd, 2010 at 9:54 am
André Williams could have done the x-tian thing and prayed for the people who publish this magazine: ‘Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do’, weren’t those the famous (almost) last words? These morons claim to have a direct line to the highest authoritiy, why do they bother mere mortals with their petty grieves?
June 22nd, 2010 at 10:29 am
I was thinking of converting to christianity, does anyone have any advice?
June 22nd, 2010 at 10:42 am
Not a comment on the article as such, but thank you for including the catholicshopper.com mention. That site has been entertaining me for the past half an hour. Especially the sporting part of the statue section.
Footballing Jebus! http://catholicshopper.com/pro.....E_3977.jpg
Seriously, out of all the religions, I think none can outdo the catholics for tasteless tat of the kind you can see on that site. Things that nobody else would even dream of giving house room, the catholics have it right there in their front room shrine.
Hilarious.
June 22nd, 2010 at 11:41 am
So would it have been OK if San Pedro had just told the Holy Spook to go forth and multiply?
June 22nd, 2010 at 11:53 am
Pete H: Have you seen this one before? How to turn Jesus on!
http://www.boreme.com/boreme/f.....tch-p1.php
There are some classic comments, too:
Christ has risen: He is cumming again; and so on!!
June 22nd, 2010 at 12:04 pm
Take note of the subliminal message in that last pic that it is only Christian children who respect their parents! They do it, of course, because God has told them that he will kill them otherwise!!
June 22nd, 2010 at 12:37 pm
@barriejohn.
Hahahahahah, is that for real or just a gag? It would be brilliant if it were real.
Here’s a site that you’ve probably seen before, but it never fails to amuse me/creep me out.
http://jesus-withyoualways.com/
June 22nd, 2010 at 12:44 pm
@Pete H
As far as I’m aware, that lightswitch is genuine.
Love the Jesus with you always thing. I’ve seen other versions where the people he’s with would rather be left in peace:
http://www.theworldsbestever.c.....-jesus.jpg
June 22nd, 2010 at 12:53 pm
It’s real – don’t know if you can buy one but there are others of a similar theme:
http://www.heathen-hangout.com.....php?t=6021
Apparently there’s a Michael Jackson version of it with two boys……..
June 22nd, 2010 at 1:03 pm
@ Broadsword
Hahah, I’ve seen one or two of those, and I did mock one up of my own with Photoshop, but I fear it’s a little too risque to post here.
June 22nd, 2010 at 1:05 pm
Yes, it’s real all right, Pete, and features all over the net! I hadn’t seen the WithYouAlways site before though. Perhaps it is “Jesus the Juggler” who is teaching that young lad on the light switch to juggle with his balls (take a look!). I don’t see “Jesus the Hamburger Seller” anywhere for some strange reason!!
June 22nd, 2010 at 1:09 pm
Off topic but have you-all seen the story about the catholic priest in connecticut who has been suspended from ministry – seems there’s a million dollars missing from the parish bankaccount. While priests who committed rape and other sexcrimes against children were allowed to continue as priests for years…..
http://www.courant.com/news/lo.....9792.story
But then,we already know RCC PLC’s priorities!
June 22nd, 2010 at 1:10 pm
I found this one, Sailor!
http://www.funlol.com/14001/Mi.....witch.html
And don’t worry: I keep alerting people to stories in the news feed as well!!
June 22nd, 2010 at 1:10 pm
sorry – there it is in the feed list…..
June 22nd, 2010 at 1:24 pm
I want to know what Jesus is expecting from the little girl in this abomination of a figurine:
http://www.michiganchurchsuppl.....HX258G.jpg
@ Achmed Don’t do it! Convert to free thinking instead (although I suspect you already have). It’s much more fun than wasting your time worrying about a sky fairy that doesn’t exist.
June 22nd, 2010 at 5:46 pm
Thanks Barrie
June 22nd, 2010 at 7:33 pm
Blasphemous joke competition? Perhaps we can upset them even more.
Q. Whats the difference between acne and a catholic priest?
A. Acne waits till you’re a teenager to come on your face.
June 22nd, 2010 at 9:41 pm
This would be more my type of Jesus!
http://store.comicfusion.net/star11919.html
(Click on image to enlarge)
June 22nd, 2010 at 10:54 pm
Barrie: only if it has a bobble-head!
June 23rd, 2010 at 2:04 am
As I understand the game of golf, you play it where it lies. If Jesus wants to cheat by inviting three magical friends, then he makes his own foursome next week. But, if Peter wants to be forgiven of blashemy, he has to explain denying the christ three times in order to save his pathetic skin, using profanity to convince his accusers. Mark 14:66-72. No wonder he’s the hero, no god head, of the pedophile priesthood.
NeoWolfe
June 23rd, 2010 at 3:00 am
Um, I guess I will never understand how wishing someone a human ecstasy ever got to be such an insult, those crazy Puritans have done it again!
June 23rd, 2010 at 3:04 am
And who busted the figurines outta my snowglobe?
June 23rd, 2010 at 7:47 am
@andrea
A compilation of blasphemous jokes to waste an hour over at work:
http://www.sickipedia.org/category/9
June 23rd, 2010 at 12:53 pm
Request denied by WatchGuard HTTP proxy.
Reason: one or more categories denied helper=’WebBlocker.5′ details=’Tasteless & Offensive’
I’ll look when I get home
June 24th, 2010 at 3:51 am
andrea said:
” Tasteless and Offensive apparently.”
Response: More like lame. Somewhat like South Park’s Butter’s script called the “Poop Who Took a Pee”. Wild dives at being offensive, total collapse on being funny. One man’s opinion, but I couldn’t read it all.
NeoWolfe