A POSTER outside the Tom Peppers pub in Clacton declares:
Thank Christ for the Easter Bank Holiday.
And it depicts a thumbs-up Jesus wearing headphones and a wide grin.
But some local Christians are less than amused by the poster, which, promises, among other Easter treats, vodka and Red Bull for £2.50 on Easter Sunday to:
Bring yourself back to life.
One purse-lipped follower of the one-and-only, never-to-be-repeated Jesus – Jean Raven, 61, of Holland-on-Sea – practically had a seizure and contacted the local Daily Gazette to voice her horror:
If you are Christian, it’s offensive. I try to be a good Christian and it upsets me.
And the Rev Ben Marlowe, senior minister at Frinton Free Church, grizzled:
This kind of advertising will undoubtedly offend all Christians, for whom the message of Easter lies at the very heart of their faith. It is also symbolic of a society that is increasingly hellbent on trivialising everything whilst it slowly amuses itself to death.
Lois Cakebread – don’t you just love that name? – is secretary of the Emmanual Church, in New Pier Street, Walton, and she had this to say:
If they were promoting the church and encouraging people to go there, it might be OK. But if it’s just promotion to get people in the pub, then no. Easter is a very special occasion in the life of the church.
Marlowe and Ms Cakebread should know better than to claim Easter for Christianity. Its origins – just like Christmas – are pure PAGAN, and – according to this Christian, David C Pack of the Restored Church of God – is not mentioned at all in the Bible.
An unrepentant Michael Denny, manager of the pub, said:
It’s something we came up with ourselves and it’s not meant to be offensive to anybody. It’s about saying it’s Easter, which is about his resurrection. We considered using the Easter bunny, but thought ultimately it was a religious festival. It doesn’t show Jesus drinking or drunk and just says what we have on offer.
He added:
We might bring the one outside the pub indoors, but I don’t believe it can be taken as offensive, otherwise I would get new posters made up.
Although the posters were created locally, all designs are approved by parent company, Cavendish Bars.
And while on the subject of Easter, how’s this for a delicious bit of barminess: Easter eggs renamed “spring spheres”.
Hat tip: Marcus
The Freethinker was founded in 1881 by GW Foote, an outspoken critic of religion. After the publication of 
April 14th, 2011 at 6:36 am
Perhaps the xians can pay a licence fee and get the rights to use the smiling happy jesus with perfect bronze age teeth as a logo . He’s a positive looking son of gawd too, big grin and thumbs up. He can’t be aware of plummeting church attendances and the small but protracted problem of clerical child rape devouring the baptist and catholic churches.
April 14th, 2011 at 7:02 am
This is so weird in so many ways.
Jesus drank, there and then it was probably only wine not vodka since he lived in a hot climate (had Russia been invented yet?), but I feel he would have approved of getting drunk at wakes (Easter). No doubt about his having a thirst after being dead for 3 nights either.
So what is so disturbing?
The fact that far less offensive things about Mohammud have wrecked peoples lives, cost them heavy fines, or in some cases actually had them killed.
Fairness in all things. Either no more tooth-fairy in dental equipment ads, or all so-called holy things are fair game.
As an atheist, I too enjoy the bank-holiday Monday!
April 14th, 2011 at 7:44 am
In response to those very sensitive people who have been upset and offended – please refer to Stephen Fry’s comment with regard to such people taking offence – ‘so f****** what !’
April 14th, 2011 at 9:07 am
Unbelieveable, this guy tacitly buys into their line that Jesus is more a symbol of Easter than the Easter Bunny, and yet they are not grateful!
April 14th, 2011 at 9:15 am
Didn’t somebody once say any publicity is good publicity? As the church is failing to attract new customers, maybe these xtians should be thanking Tom Peppers for the free publicity.
April 14th, 2011 at 9:17 am
I noticed the repeated use of the word offensive. As I’ve atated before, the fundies are taking note of the muslims (who, it appears are permanently offended) and using this word a lot these days.
When I read this site, it would be easy to be ‘offended’ by the daily stupidity and hatred spouted by fundy christians, but I’ve evolved past that stage, I just have contempt instead.
April 14th, 2011 at 10:22 am
These Christians haven paid much attention to their precious Jesus, who allowed the Romans to nail him to a cross, after some heavy flogging, and he didn’t do anything to stop them!! So can’t they zip it when someone makes an innocent joke? Jesus might have done just that.
April 14th, 2011 at 10:23 am
“maybe these xtians should be thanking Tom Peppers for the free publicity.”
Or rather, Tom Peppers should be thanking the xtians? When will they ever learn that their fussing serves only to generate interest and free publicity in the thing they are whinging about?
April 14th, 2011 at 10:25 am
For a start Easter long pre dated christianity. Christians purloined the ideas which suited them as they have done for so much else. They conveyed Stoic ideas to their monks and said they came from St Paul – just one blatant example.
Next, how creepy is it that these narrow minded, dried up bigots think that they need to defend and protect a god who is running the show with upwards from a thousand million stars in this one galaxy alone. Light, zooming along at 180,000 miles a second takes close to 24,000 years to reach, from the centre of the galaxy, this piddling little rock we live on. Wouldn’t you think if a being with that kind of clout could look after himself?
I hope the landlord sticks to his guns and sees them off. They are looking for offense. I was offended this morning to hear the Chief Rabbi, Lord somebody or other, giving his unsound opnions on the dire Thought for the Day about what Moses said and did as if Lord Whatsit were relating a factual news story from yesterday. Don’t the BBC have any regard for facts and truth or are they on hold when religious crap is being preached.
April 14th, 2011 at 11:00 am
Should have said “Thank Mithra” because that’s where the xians got the whole death and resurrection myth from. If you are going to plagiarise your beliefs (Mithraism and paganism mythology in the case of Easter), you don’t have much of a leg to stand on when someone takes the piss of them.
April 14th, 2011 at 12:40 pm
Why don’t these xtians try practising some of this forgiveness they keep banging on about?
April 14th, 2011 at 1:06 pm
If these xtian nutters are so offended why don’t they ask their sky fuhrer to intervene and smite them or whatever he is supposed to do; but gawd didn’t do much to prevent his “son” from being nailed to some wood did he?
April 14th, 2011 at 1:20 pm
But oddly the xtians are complaining about….
Thank Christ for the Easter Bank Holiday.
Which is a completely true statement and aren’t xtians suppose to be about truth? (Except were religion is concerned).
The Bank holiday is NOT there because of the pagan holiday of easter but because of the xtian myth of the zombification ( new word?) of the CheesUs.
So the Bank holiday is because of CheesUs.
They must be upset because the poster shows CheesUs having a good time which is something the xtians don’t know how to do since they are stuck on their knees.
April 14th, 2011 at 1:58 pm
“If you are Christian, it’s offensive. I try to be a good Christian and it upsets me.”
Not trying very hard, are you? The concept of ‘turn the other cheek’ appears to have escaped you.
Sigh. This whole thing is so pathetic and so predictable. When these Christians start getting all upset over children being raped by the clergy while the hierarchy covers it up; women, homosexuals and transgendered people being denied health care because of someone’s petty bigotry; students having their right to education ripped away from them; doctors, nurses and civil servants being sacked in enormous numbers and banks and phone companies getting away with not at all rendering unto Caesar that which is Caesar’s, then I might give them the time of day when they claim something offends them. Till then, I’ll just see them as self-centred, petty twits.
April 14th, 2011 at 5:58 pm
If I didn’t know they were Fine Upstanding Christians, who’d never stoop to dishonesty, I’d swear these people go out of their way to look for offence!
April 14th, 2011 at 7:29 pm
They are so anxious for free speech and free behaviour (wearing their crosses) until others exercise the same freedom and then they want it curbed. Freedom for religion; censorship for the rest.
April 14th, 2011 at 8:36 pm
Whilst the christians are getting ‘offended’ over every imagined slight, would it be crass of me to be offended over homophobia, picketing soldiers funerals, covering up paedo priests, killing of abortion doctors, incorrect advice on aids in Africa, Bob Moorehead, Douglas Goodman, Albert Odulele, Rwanda and Northern Ireland? How dare they claim to be ‘offended’.
I appreciate I’ve only just covered the last 20 years and just scratched the surface, but when I look at christians I (joking) thank god I am not one.
April 14th, 2011 at 9:48 pm
I’m really not sure if this is Python or not.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-e.....e-13050686
April 14th, 2011 at 11:33 pm
@anonymous – that is pretty pathetic even for a clergyman.
Everyone knows that Liverpool’s comeback against Milan was far more impressive from being 3-0 down at half time. Thats even more spectacular than rising from the dead if ypu ask me, as the entire team were dead and buried after 45 mins.
April 15th, 2011 at 1:25 am
Religion and football made me think of this…
April 15th, 2011 at 3:13 am
The origin of the Easter bunny:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Easter_Bunny#Origins
When one realizes the corruption of christmas, the supposed birth of the messiah, with the winter solstice celebrated by pagans, you have to wonder what intellectual basis they have to protect their celebration of a pagan fertility rite at the spring equinox.
DG said:
“Or rather, Tom Peppers should be thanking the xtians? When will they ever learn that their fussing serves only to generate interest and free publicity in the thing they are whinging about?”
Genious, isn’t it? Who needs an advertising agent when all you have to do is piss off some hypersensitive crossection of society, and you get more advertising than you could dream of on TV and internet news. BDuke has become a pawn in the scheme. LOL.
tony e said:
“I appreciate I’ve only just covered the last 20 years and just scratched the surface, but when I look at christians I (joking) thank god I am not one.”
Response: I concur. Genuine freedom.
NeoWolfe
April 15th, 2011 at 12:37 pm
well i quite like it, wonder what jesus is listening to???
April 15th, 2011 at 2:24 pm
@Daz. Thanks. Funny.
You may know of this allegedly true incident. Outside a Liverpool Church was a poster saying, JESUS SAVES.
Underneath, with typical Scowser wit someone had scrawled, “But St John scores on the rebound.”
April 16th, 2011 at 7:20 pm
Good link Daz! And Broga – gotta love that cheeky scouse wit
April 17th, 2011 at 11:23 am
I live in Clacton, the pub is on the way to the pier and the beach. Me and the sprog walked past this sign and thought ‘It looks like the Buddy Christ’ and walked on forgetting the whole thing. This was on the front page of the local paper.
Clacton’s a pretty right wing Tory Christian area (nothing to do with the influx of cockneys and the elderly I’m sure), so I’m not suprised this caused offence. I do wish people would just get over it. I’m more bothered about the exploitative posters of women they have outside this pub, as well as the drunk neanderthal fuck-tards that spill out of this club on a Saturday night when I’m walking home from work.
April 19th, 2011 at 3:20 am
Rozi said:
‘It looks like the Buddy Christ’
Dogma. Jay and Silent Bob. Ben Afleck. Matt Damon. Chris Rock (apostle 13).
They could sue for copyright infringement.
NeoWolfe