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Spanish priest challenges Church to measure his anus

Spanish priest challenges Church to measure his anus

WITH no apparent evidence other than a photograph of Spanish priest Andreas Garci­a Torres hugging a young Cuban seminarian, the Catholic bishop of Getafe has leapt to the outrageous conclusion that there is something gay about two topless men in a warm embrace.

According to this report, the bishop now wants the priest to abandon his parish in the Madrid dormitory town of Fuenlabrada, undergo a psychiatric cure, and take an HIV test.

Torres responded by saying he intends going to Rome to show that he is being expelled from his parish unfairly.

The priest, who insists that he and the 28-year-old with whom he was photographed on a trip to Fatima are just good friends, and threw down this challenge:

Let them measure my anus and see if it is dilated.

He said his mum hadn’t stopped crying over what has happened.

Locals say that the priest is a very humane person, dedicated to helping others. More than 1,000 signatures have been gathered in his support.

Hat tip: Alistair

62 Responses to “Spanish priest challenges Church to measure his anus”

  1. Victor says:

    So, he likes having his anus measured. I thought I’d heard of everything.

  2. Anonymous says:

    It is a win-win for the priest, isn’t it?

  3. S Santistevan says:

    What does this portend for female catholics? Mother superiors and their novices? Well, possibly Bunuel would have had los cojones to tackle this sensitive topic.

  4. Graham ASH-PORTER says:

    Better than him ramming it to young children of either sex, like the rest of them do. Disgusting, (supposed virgins) pontificating on sexuals morals.

  5. [...] average breast size, but it never crossed my mind to do one about average anus size. If I did, that information might be helpful to the Catholic Church right about now: WITH no apparent evidence other than a photograph of Spanish priest Andrés García Torres hugging [...]

  6. In the old days, young men had an ambition to enter the priesthood. It would appear these days, it’s the other way round…

  7. CriticalEyeYayeye says:

    He should have challenged the ‘Poop’ to suck his Anus!!!!

  8. Vichy says:

    Not all priests are gay, but they are all faggots. Who cares what happens to this guy. Maybe getting expelled will cause him to think rationally for once in his life.

  9. Tommy H says:

    Being gay myself…i find this article hilarious!
    the RC Church and any form of Christianity have the same out-dated, colloquial and side splittingly funny views! i was having a miserable day until i read this, honestly! they should turn it into a sitcom of some sort lol,
    and who cares what the horde of pedophiles thinks?!? seriously and if he’s gay then he’s gay! and as others have said…the look on the younger guys face looks totally post coital.
    not to sound hateful myself in the slightest but the Vatican should either be destroyed as there’s no need for such a baroque building in this day and age, or it should be turned into a museum or some other useful building rather than be used to house 10000′s of pedophiles, rape condoning, bigoted and self righteous pre-jugemental Morons. ’nuff said ^.^

  10. [...] Accused of being gay, Spanish priest challenges Church to measure his anus [...]

  11. George says:

    Thank you Nuran, i love you man

  12. Samantha says:

    Measure your own damn anus!! :P