Pastor dies torching a ‘gay’ cereal box
A jackass Christian got into his thick skull that Cheerios are gay fodder. Then he died horribly.
Because of the manufacturer’s support of same-sex marriage, Michael Leisner decided to set fire to a cereal box outside General Mills’ Minnesota headquarters in protest.
According to this report, it quickly went horribly wrong. After clumsily lighting the cereal on fire, Leisner sets the box on the ground, and the flames quickly spread across the grass. As panic begins to set in, the pink-shirted pastor tells a young-sounding girl shooting a video of the event, and other accomplices were along for the caper to:
Get out of here, guys.
As he grabs his materials and flees the scene while the girl laughs at him, he say:
Quick! Quick, get in the car!
In the video clip, the Leisner begins by saying:
One out of every eight boxes of cereal in this country is Cheerios. This is really the treat now for homosexuals. And this is our protest of General Mills advocating same-sex marriages, so we are going to torch some cereal.
Leisner was then sacked from his job as a real estate agent, and fate dealt him the ultimate blow when, last Saturday, Leisner, 65, turned up his toes while waiting in his car for two of his children to finish playing tennis.
The video went vital a sensation and prompted a criminal investigation by police. Leisner’s death brings that investigation to an abrupt end. His funeral service is scheduled for Friday morning at the Emmanuel Christian Center.
And just when you thought this report couldn’t get any funnier, along comes this: in a Facebook tribute, one of Leisner’s nephews – a missionary in Costa Rica –wrote in Spanish that Leisner was as “bold as a lion of God,” though some would remember him as “a flaming Elijah”.
Unfortunately, an English translation on the Facebook page mangled part of the tribute. “Please pray for the family of Mike to feel the spirit of God as dildo in this time of a loss,” the Bing translation notes.
Unfortunately, this post broke too late for it to be included in The Digital Journal, where earlier today Alexander Baron described the Freethinker as:
The nasty face of atheism.
Hat tip: BarrieJohn (Leisner) and Terry Sanderson (Digital Journal).
• This piece first appeared on the FT site on August 16, 2012.