‘Delusional’ Israeli fails to get a restraining order against God

‘Delusional’ Israeli fails to get a restraining order against God

An Israeli man, pissed off at the unkind treatment meted out to him by God, has unsuccessfully petitioned the Haifa Magistrate’s Court for a restraining order against the Almighty.

The Times of Israel reported that the initiator of the request, a resident of the northern port city, represented himself in court.

A protocol of the hearing noted that God did not turn up for the session, although it did not specify how the court determined the Omnipresent was not in fact there, as opposed to merely exercising his right to remain silent.

The petitioner noted that he had tried to obtain the restraining order from police for the past three years but that police had merely sent a patrol car to his home on ten occasions.

He argued that over a three-year period God, had exhibited a seriously negative attitude toward him, although details of just what divine mischief he had borne the brunt of were not mentioned.

Presiding Judge Ahsan Canaan denied the request, which he said was ludicrous, asserting the applicant needed help not from the court but rather from other sources.

The report did not include a response on the outcome from any of the multitude of available spokespeople on behalf of the Lord.

The man was identified in by the Independent as David Shoshan, and that the judge described him as “delusional”.

The Independent said:

God could not be contacted for comment.

Hat tip: Angela_K

11 responses to “‘Delusional’ Israeli fails to get a restraining order against God”

  1. Lucy1 says:

    But according to them, God was present in the court. Should have been done for contempt of court for remaining silent.

  2. CoastalMaineBird says:

    it did not specify how the court determined the Omnipresent was not in fact there

    Hopefully, the same way they determined that Elvis was not in fact there.

  3. L.Long says:

    So by not being there, and the judge stating the man needed help, the legal stance is gawd doing things is ludicrous or in plain language the idea of gawd is extremely stupid!
    No argument here!

  4. Angela_K says:

    It is worth reading some of the comments in the link to “The Independent” some are quit witty.

    I’m amused the judge in this case said the man was delusional, wouldn’t that apply to all religious people?

  5. barriejohn says:

    It’s a pity that he didn’t sentence the Almighty to some community service. A couple of hundred hours spent healing the sick – which is what he is supposed to be doing – would be time well spent in my opinion.

  6. 1859 says:

    ‘…it did not specify how the court determined the Omnipresent was not in fact there…’

    Maybe this might finally prove to all those delusional believers that god is not there, never has been there, never will be there, because he/she/it (‘heshit’) does not exist.

  7. Laura Roberts says:

    “God could not be contacted for comment.” Pretty much sums it up.

  8. Trevor Blake says:

    The faithful who will refuse to blame God never fail to credit God. It’s as if God was their name for the things that they like. Saying “I like that!” might be more honest.

  9. jay says:

    Why is it delusional to ask God to bug off but not delusional to ask God for help?

  10. Peter Ratcliff says:

    Elvis is everywhere!

  11. barriejohn says:

    No – Elvis had left the building.