Donald Trump indicted by the Order of Perpetual Indulgence
On the eve of Trump’s inauguration, the Order of Perpetual Indulgence Convent of Dunn Eideann in Scotland performed a Rite of Canonical Indictment & Excommunication against America’s 45th President.
According to a statement issued earlier today, the ceremony took place in Edinburgh outside Waverley Gate (the former GPO Building) in Princes Street and was conducted by Sister Ann Tici Pation, pictured above.
Similar ceremonies were performed throughout the world by other Order of Perpetual Indulgence members.
According to the statement, the text and structure of this excommunication rite is adapted from one introduced by the Pope Zachary in the 8th Century, as described in the Pontificale Romanum and practiced up until the Second Vatican Council in 1962. The ceremony traditionally involved a bishop, with twelve priests with candles, and is solemnly pronounced in some suitably conspicuous place.
The bishop would then pronounce the formula of the anathema. After the pronouncement, the bishop would then ring a bell, close a holy book, and the assisting priests would snuff out their candles by dashing them to the ground, and thus was born the expression “by bell, book and candle”.
The Sisters and Brothers of the Order of Perpetual Indulgence are part of “a worldwide order of queer people of all sexualities”. Formed around 1979 in response to attacks on the queer community by fundamentalist religious organisations, its tenets are:
The expiation of stigmatic guilt, and the promulgation of universal joy.
The release said:
By eradicating guilt and promoting universal joy, we aim to end prejudice and intolerance towards those who ‘dare to be different’. By manifesting in habit, the Sisters and Brothers challenge gender stereotypes and the oppression of organised religious orthodoxy, which still refuses to accept queers (or, indeed, anyone living an ‘unacceptable’ lifestyle) as being equal members of society with a right to their sexuality.
The Order is not a religious order, nor is it anti religion. Many within the Order observe a religious or spiritual life. Others do not. The Order is open to all who feel the call of the habit.
We celebrate at public events. We demonstrate. We perform queer affirmative ritual, do fund-raising, perform memorials and generally drag up in habit at any invitation.
In performing the Rite, Sister Ann Tici Pation intoned:
In the presence of Maude Almighty, and the Golden Trinity of Blanche, Dorothy and Rose, invoke the canonical powers of the fierce, the fae and the fabulous to indict the trickster con-man, Donald J Trump, and all his greedy, self-serving minions, for Sins Against Decency.
Including but not limited to the following acts of grievous offence:
Racism, misogyny, xenophobia, hate-mongering, cruelty, greed, contempt for the truth and myriad other sins of omission and commision, known and unknown, spoken and unspoken …
In virtue of the power which has been given us of binding and loosing on this good earth and beyond the Veil, in all worlds and between the worlds, we deprive this dark trickster, Donald J Trump, and all his accomplices and all his abettors of the Communion of the Decent, we separate him out as an enemy of all the lovers of peace and justice, we exorcise him from the Body Politic of the United States and the world, we exclude him from the bosom of our Holy Mother, the Spirit of Joy, and we henceforth conscribe and bind him of all malice and bane.
And we declare him excommunicated and anathematized, and we judge him condemned to an icy hell of complete irrelevance, designed and furnished in knotty pine, with one small TV playing ‘A League of Their Own’ on a perpetual loop and absolutely zero Internet access, so long as he will not burst the fetters of his epic ignorance, cruelty and narcissism and, do penance and restitution for his many crimes and misdeeds to satisfy the Will of the Decent, the Just, and the Radically Indulgent; we deliver him to oblivion, to await the final judgement on his eternal soul.
So mote it be! So mote it be! So mote it be!